The Unloved and Unwanted.

(picture taken from the internet)

I am listening to a podcast from Steven Furtick and he’s talking about ‘Why Rejection is Actually a Blessing’ where he talked about the story of Leah, Jacob and Rachel. Yeap, the famous Bible love-triangle. 

So, I decided to re-look into the story about Leah, Jacob and Rachel.

To give you a bit of a background, I will tell you the summarised version of this love-triangle story. Leah and Rachel were sisters, daughters of Laban. As the bible noted, Leah was said to have no sparkle in her eyes (in some Bible translations it was said that Leah had a weak eyes, so maybe in this modern age, Leah was one of those who wear glasses and looking like a geek) but Rachel in the other hand had a beautiful figure and a lovely face (yes, that popular girl). 

There was no sparkle in Leah’s eyes, but Rachel had a beautiful figure and a lovely face. (Genesis 29:17)

Jacob was Laban’s nephew, when he was on the run, he sought refuge in Laban’s house and during his stay there, fell in love with Rachel. He told his uncle that he wanted to marry Rachel. Laban told Jacob that if he wanted to marry Rachel then Jacob would need to work for Laban for seven years. Jacob agreed and he worked for Laban for seven years.

In the end of the agreement, Jacob came to Laban and asked him to fulfil his promise which was to marry Jacob to Rachel. So Laban married his daughter to Jacob but after the wedding night, Jacob was surprised to find out that he actually married Leah instead of Rachel. He was so upset and came to see Laban. Laban told Jacob that it was not good if Rachel as the younger sister got married before her older sister, Leah. 

Then Laban came up with another condition to Jacob, Jacob could marry Rachel only if he promised that after the wedding he would work for another seven years for Laban. For the sake of his love, Jacob agreed to the condition, married Rachel and then worked for Laban for another seven years. And the Bible stated that he loved her so much. 

I believe this story would ring closer to some of us. We might feel like Leah, feeling like we’re not good enough compared to other people, feeling unloved, unwanted and rejected. 

When I read that Leah had weak eyes, I can totally relate to her, because me, myself, has been wearing glasses since I was young. Glasses, braces, you name it! I also have always been chubby since I was a kid so speaking of physical appearance, there was time when I really hate to look at myself in the mirror. When the common standards of beauty involving a long silky black hair, white skin and slender figure, my physical appearance was (and still is) totally the opposite of the standards.

So, in terms of physical appearance I know how it feels to compare yourself to other women and noticing that they look better, prettier and lovelier than you. It wasn’t a nice feeling at all, haha. 

There are moments in life as well that I feel unloved, unwanted and rejected just because I fit in the common standards of beauty. It was a damage to my self-worth and I takes quite some time for me to really recover and starting to love myself. 

Other than the physical appearance, there were a lot of things that made me feel not good enough when I compare myself to certain people. From educational background, family background, and so on. I know that as humans, some of us might feel the same thing and it can be very painful. 

Just like Leah. Imagine that a man was married to you not because of he loved you but because he loved your sister, who was said as more beautiful than you. Imagine how painful it must be. But interestingly, this is what the Bible says:

When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children, but Rachel could not conceive. (Genesis 29:31)

 

For sure I believe that, God saw her tears at night as her heart was broken of the rejection and the loneliness, because she felt that she was the unwanted one. So, to continue the verse, God enabled her to do something that her sister could not do. 

 

That’s something that God does best. He choose the unloved, the unwanted, the rejected and He does great things through them. He’s the God who choose the unchosen, those who are unfit the world's standards, those who are underestimated (remember David), because God sees what’s inside of us. Our potential. Our future. 

All of us will deal with rejection from time to time, rejection is not a dead end, but it’s a redirection. If people reject us it’s a sign that they’re not the right one for us anyway, when a group of people reject us sometimes it’s the sign that they are flying too low and we have no business in their altitude anyway because God will take us even higher. 

 

We don’t need the approval from the Jacobs in our lives just to prove our worth if we know that God has chosen us since the beginning and He has everything good in His hands for us. If you feel like a Leah today, know that you are loved. You are created to be loved and you don’t need to seek for the approval from those who cannot love you and accept you the way you are. Just look to the One who created you with love, who knows you inside and out and love you still. 

 

This is not only for women but also for men, for everyone who has been in pain of rejection in their lives. I have been there and I know how painful it is, I have been through a time where I wish I can change everything in me, where I wish life is different for me, where I wish my family condition is better and I can have the life like those people I’m comparing myself with. But, knowing God and having a personal journey with Him, it changes everything. 

 

I know God loves me as who I am and I like that. My hair might always be short, my body might need extra effort to be a little bit better in terms of shape and my skin would always be tan, but I love myself the way I am just fine :D - I love my smile. I love my eyes. I love me. With God, I learn to recognise my strength and my weaknesses. I learn how to develop my strength and overcome my weaknesses. Of course I still stumble and fail but I always learn how to get back up again, how to forgive not just other people but also myself, learn something and move on. 

It’s not as easy as flipping your palm upside down but surely, the way to healing starts with acceptance and forgiveness. It starts from within. You cannot change some things in your life, but you can change something, you can change how you look at things and you can open your heart to trust the One who made it. 

Stop wasting time on people who don’t love you. Find those who do love you and most importantly, look into the mirror, find the real you and start loving yourself. I know how it feels to live on seeking for approval from other people and I can definitely tell you that it's definitely not worth it. If people cannot love you for who you are then no matter how hard you try to win their approval or acknowledgment, it still won't make them love you. So, move on and settle down with people who love you for who you are, who celebrate you, trust you and will always encourage you to be the best version of you.

Remember, just because you are rejected doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong in you, maybe people just can’t see what’s inside of you. If they do, if they can see how precious you are, how wonderful your heart is, how great your talents are, how sharp you mind is…they would think twice. *virtual hugs to those who might be feeling down and unloved today* - You matter, you are precious and the world still needs you.

The Voices Within.

I'm writing this on a bumpy boat ride for a one day dive trip on my phone. Plugging my ears with my earphones and listening to the music. Separating me from the world around me, having a solitude moment just me and my thoughts. I cannot hear anything but the sound of music in my ears not even to the sound of the boat engine or the wind and a thought come into my mind.

What have I been listening to lately? What kind of voices do I listen to? What have I been telling myself so far? And how is it affecting me in looking at myself?

Ever since we were born in this world, I believe we have been listening to so many voices. The voices that might bring us down or lift us up.

How many times have we been told that we can or can't do something in our lives? How many times have we heard words that break us or build us? How many times have we felt important or not important by what other people say about us? How many times have we even felt loved and unloved what other people is telling us?

I believe most of us have been there, in the situation where other people’s voices is affecting us in a way. But, more than the external voices we hear from other people, the most influential voice is our own inner voice. What we have been telling ourselves.

To my experience, we are the harshest judge for ourselves, we often condemn ourselves more than other people does. As a person who once been through a depression with a battle inside the mind, I know for sure that what we are telling to our self is the greatest influence of all.

We need to turn down the loud negative voices within and start to say only the good, positive and lovely things to our self. In short, we should not only be kind to other people but also to our own self.

Of course it is not easy because I know that as human being it is easier for us to find our flaws instead of our strengths. If it’s hard for you to understand what I mean, let’s do the following:

I need you to list down what your strengths are in the next 1 minute.

Okay, are you done?

Good, now, I need you to list down what your flaws or weaknesses are in the next 1 minute. 

Done?

Now compare the two lists and see which one is longer. I bet now you know what I mean :)

It is easier to spot our flaws and weaknesses rather than our strengths. That proves that we are the harshest judge over ourselves and we haven't been giving enough highlight, celebration and appreciation for our strengths. 

It’s a long struggle for me as well to learn how to love myself. Since I was young I was always compared to everyone. I was compared to my cousins, I was compared to my friends, I was compared to my parents’ friend’s children and so on. My life has always been in comparison and it’s hard to believe that I am actually good enough. I grew up to be a person that was always cautious about what everyone else is thinking about me and failure was something unacceptable for me.

I was afraid to try anything because I would afraid to fail and worse there was a time where I was afraid to talk to new people, like asking a sales person at the store about the things I want to buy, the cashier to pay or even ordering something at fast found counter was considered as a big deal to me.

Yes, I was that afraid of people. I was afraid that if I said something wrong, they would laugh at me. I was afraid to ask question if I don’t understand something, afraid that people might look down on me or afraid that they would think that my question was so stupid. So I built a habit of finding things out on my own.

Whenever I failed at doing something, said something that I thought of as stupid or receiving a negative feedback from other people, I would condemn and judged myself. It would take days even months for me to get over it. I would blame myself over and over again and played the situation in my head over and over.

I always believed that I was a failure, that I would never do something that make my parents proud, that I would never make it, and that I would never be able to work well or solved anything on my own. I always believe that I would never be able to talk in public, I always believe that I would never live a good life, that I would never achieved anything good in my life.

Why?

Because there was always this voice inside of my head that keep saying that I am not good enough and will never be good enough. That I am a failure, that no one would ever love me, that I have no future, and so on. 

It took a long journey for me to finally be where I am today and I am grateful that through the healing process, I have finally able to start loving myself. For me, it started when I knew God and being in the right community that believed in me, support me and accept me as who I am. 

I am forever grateful to God because He is the greatest part of my healing process. He never get tired telling me that He loves me in many ways and that I was created with a purpose. It doesn't matter what people say about me, it doesn't change the fact that God created me with a purpose, He created me according to His image and He created me to be loved. God is the main reason why I'm still breathing and living and be who I am today.  

Knowing my self-worth that I am precious, that I am created with love, that failure is just a part of learning to be better, that I am created as I am and I am just wonderful the way I am, definitely changed me. When I start realizing the facts, I started to see myself differently. Whenever I looked at myself in the mirror, I always try to say good things to myself and when I started doing that, I gain my confidence and I start to love the person I see in the mirror. 

Whenever the terror comes from the negative voices within, I would look at myself in the mirror and started to say good things, positive things, wonderful things about myself. I would read the Bible to remind me of how wonderful God created me. I would pray and ask God to remind me over and over and over again, that I am loved the way I am, that I am precious, that I am wonderful, that I am able to do anything through Christ who strengthen me. 

When I started to choose to listen only to the good and positive voices (and God's voice for sure), it changed everything and I start to see good things are happening in my life. I never feel the need to compare myself to anyone else now because I have a completely amazing life, a life where I can truly feel and witness God's faithfulness and His amazing works that always leave me in awe. The way God always come through in every situation that I'm going through in life is something too wonderful not be thankful for. 

That timid little girl who was so afraid of what people think of her is now able to stand before many people and speak, even led worship at one time. Now, she doesn't hesitate to reach out to people first and talk to them. Yes, she is still cautious at times, she still think of what people think of her too sometimes, but she doesn't let it intimidate her instead she turns it into something that help her to reflect on herself and improve herself for the better. 

When you start to listen to the right voice, then the way you see yourself will change. If you start to listen only to the good and positive voice, then you will start to love yourself. No matter what people say, believe that you are precious, you matter, you are loved, you have a wonderful future and you are able to do anything you want to do. 

It's time to turn down the negative voices and turn up the positive voices. Start celebrating your life and strengths. Look into the mirror and be grateful for who you are. Smile and see how it changes your life. 

It is okay not to feel okay.

Just recently we all read the news of Chester Bennington, the lead vocalist of Linkin Park, killed himself. I believe the news came a shock to many people who have been growing up with Linkin Park. I am not a fan of Linkin Park, although I used to enjoy listening to some of their songs. Their album, "Meteora" was a very nice album that I listened to repeatedly, I admire how Chester would sing the songs with his powerful voice and as far I can remember, there’s always a hint of ‘pain’ in his voice and the songs he sang. 

Recently, we have heard a lot of suicide news from well-known people. The reason is always the same, depression. They felt depressed to the point they felt no hope to keep on living. I never thought of those who called for suicide decision as weak. In fact, I feel sad for them. I feel sad because finally the hopelessness takes over. 

I know how it feels like struggling with your inner demons that no one really understands, it requires all the strength you have to fight them and to survive. So I know for sure they are not weak. 

They are also not selfish because some of them I know making that decision because they don’t want to be a burden for other people if they continue on living with the depression. 

I do agree that suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary condition, but for those who have been in the hell-hole, it’s hard to see that. This is why, having someone that really care for you during those dark times is really important, if your loved ones are battling with depression, be patient, hold their hands and walk with them step by step, because inside, they are fighting so hard to survive. Stop asking “Why are you depressed?” because most of the time, they don’t even know why they are feeling depressed and please stop saying that, “Oh, maybe it’s just you being overthinking.” because it’s not overthinking, it’s a fierce battle in the mind and God forbid, hopefully you will never have to deal with it. 

 

“Depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person's thoughts, behavior, feelings, and sense of well-being. People with a depressed mood may be notably sad, anxious, or empty; they may also feel notably hopeless, helpless, dejected, or worthless.”

 

Years ago, I was depressed. It was tough years. I think too many changes, too many things to handle, no one to talk to and no one seems to understand finally took its toll. I often spent nights crying with no reason, I would wake up in the middle in the night and felt a terrible pain in my heart, I felt as if I was in a urge of being crazy when things are seem hard to handle (I honestly think so), I had terrible mood swings, I lost my interest in living, I hate everyone, I hate myself and I felt so empty that I started to have suicidal thoughts. 

There’s an unexplainable pain in my heart that I could not let it out, so I developed a habit of being a cutter. I bought a cutter every day and every time I felt like I could not handle the pain, I would cut myself with the cutter and somehow I felt that the pain inside was lessened. (Now, that it has passed, I’m so glad that it didn’t left permanent marks on my arms). 

During that hard time, I was glad that I had a best friend who cared enough for me. Who would constantly reaching out to me and in a way, saved me. She would confiscated my cutter, she would hold my hand every time I wanted to cut myself. She would always check on me to see if there was new scars on me or not. When the other so called "close" friends judged me, she reached out to me and stood by me. She never asked me why I felt depressed or just brushed me off by saying that I was being overthinking or dramatic. No, she never did that. She was always there to encourage me although as teenager at that time, I know she also had her own matters to handle. I owe her so much. 

 

The worst battle is always the one going on inside of your head. That’s where you are most vulnerable and that’s where you are mostly judged by yourself. The mind is the fiercest battlefield. So, I know how tiring it is for depressed people to have to fight it all the time. 

Depressed people don’t necessary look like they are sad all the time or mad all the time, sometimes they can look cheerful at the outside or look okay but broken in the inside. If you look closely then you might see the symptoms, such as mood swings, addiction on something, the occasionally blank look in their eyes, their thoughts of the future and so on. 

People are good in hiding what they are feeling inside, afraid that if they are being honest, they might get hurt, they might be judged, and they might be told that they are weak. Truth is, no one is born as a strong people, and we grow strong because we manage to deal with the hardships. It is okay to not to feel okay, none of us is perfect and all of us has feelings. We can get scared, we can get afraid, we can get anxious, we can get down, we can feel frustrated at times, we can feel sad, we can feel helpless, and it is okay to feel all those negative emotions. 

Trust me that it is okay. It is part of us being humans. We feel.

But, if things are starting to feel out of hand and you feel like you are drowning in those negative emotions. Reach out for help. Don't go through it alone. Find someone you can trust. Find someone you can rely on. Find someone who loves you. Reach out to them. 

Don't be scared, don't be afraid. Speak up. Speak of your pain, speak of your fears, and speak of your scars, wounds, anything that weighs you down. Let it go. Forgive the people that have caused you pain, but most of all...YOU NEED TO FORGIVE YOURSELF...so you can start to love yourself. 

No, you are never a mistake. No matter how dark you park was. It is not your fault, you are just struggling to live and we are all. We are all in a journey trying to figure out what life means to us. Nobody gets it instantly. Nobody is perfect. Everyone has flaws. But still, that doesn't make you a mistake. 

When I found myself back, the first thing I did was to forgive myself. I forgive myself for being imperfect, I forgive myself for having flaws, I forgive myself, before then I start to love myself. It was not an instant journey, it took years for me to finally love myself and to finally recognise my self-worth. When I start loving myself only then I can start to see my purpose and my vision of the future, hope returns to my life and now, I am loving life with all my heart. 

I am grateful that I have my best friend with me and during my journey to recovery, I am blessed that God has put good people in my life, people who support and encourage me when things are getting hard. People that believe in me more than I even believe in myself. Having the right people around me has helped me a lot to finally get out of that hard time. I could have never been in where I am right now if it wasn’t for them and for God. 

People who know me now might not know that once I struggled with depression. I didn’t really talk about it but since I’ve been reading a lot news regarding suicide and its relation to depression, I felt compelled to share my story. If you are struggling with depression, I will never get tired to say, reach out to somebody, reach out for help. It is okay, asking for a help is never a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength that you are humble enough to admit that you can’t do it alone. 

Whenever I am feeling that things are overwhelming, I would pick up my phone and reach out to my friends. I would ask to meet them, I would ask for their time, I would ask them to be with me because when I’m alone, that’s when the battle starts inside my mind. I would down on my knees and pray, I would read the Bible verses and saying it over and over to myself and I would tell God that I’m trusting Him my life. It’s my other way to deal with depression, I run to the One who is holding my life. 

The more I learned about depression, I noted that it’s not just about the battle in the mind but it’s also a medical condition where your body is suffering from chemical imbalance. In my case, whenever I’m lacking magnesium or vitamin B-12, I realise am more vulnerable to stress and depression. Thus, I used to store dark chocolate in handy and vitamin B-12 so I can balance my mind. I figured this out when I was talking with a friend who also suffered for depression and she told me that I should try eating dark chocolate and took vitamin B-12. It worked for me. 

There were many reasons and cause for depression, but to know that you need to first reach out for help. Seek even medical attention if necessary. 

And if you happen to be a family or a friend of someone who’s going to depression. I want to quote something from Stephen Fry,

“If you know someone who is depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather.

Try to understand the blackness, the lethargy, the hopelessness and loneliness they are going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest and best things you will ever do”

It would be hard, it would be a long journey, but walk with them step by step and be patient with them. Help them to get any help they need and be with them.

 

I know that people can be in various stages of depression. Some are still on early stage (like I was), some might be struggling with it for years already and it’s not getting easier for you. But, really don’t go through it alone, if I can get through it, I know you can too. You are strong, you are precious, you matter and the world still needs you. 

*hugs to everyone who is struggling with depression right now* 

 

 

 

Connecting People.

For those who grow up in the 90s era you would be very aware of a mobile phone brand from Finland with the famous tagline “Connecting People” --yes, I know you know that one! :D

It’s one of my favourite brand tagline. 

The world as we know it, is not that BIG. The more you meet people, the more you know that everyone is connected to one another and sometimes in a very unusual or unique manner and situation.

I have met people randomly that coincidentally connected to someone that I know. Like a friend’s friend that is friend with the other friend. Okay, now that sounds so complicated. LOL. But that’s the reality, somehow we are all connected to each other and sometimes we miss that connection. 

I love meeting new people and connecting people that I know. If a friend needs something that I know another friend has the resource then I love to introduce them to each other. I love to see people working together and help each other. It doesn’t matter whether they remember me or not, as long as I know that by knowing each other they can grow or make something together for greater good, then as a bystander I am happy enough :)

You might ask, why do I do that? What is the benefit for me? Well, maybe it’s because I know how it feels when you need help and no one is there to help you and how grateful you are when someone is finally offering you the help that you need. And I know how it feels to struggle in finding people to work together in achieving a purpose or dream. 

In building relationship, I never thought of gain and loss. I never thought of what you can give to me or what kind of benefit I can get by having a relationship with you. I simply treasure the encounter and value the connection no matter how small or big it is because I’ll never know what the connection will be in the future. 

I believe that every one that crosses our path has a purpose and I cherish every purpose. Good or bad, there’s always something to be grateful for in every connection.

I always love what my pastor said, “People are like seeds. You will never know what kind of tree that might be produced from a seed. Those who are sitting next to you might be the next president of this country or maybe the next noble prize winner. You will never know and what you can do is helping the seed to grow.” --that for me, including connecting people who might need each other with a hope that they can help each other and grow together in achieving their purpose. 

I believe that we are all connected to each other somehow as a part of a greater purpose and each of us no matter how big or small has a contribution in it whether we realise it or not. I watched a speech video by Mark Zuckerberg the other day (click here), and he said this, “Finding your purpose isn’t enough. The challenge of our generation is to create a world where everyone has a sense of purpose. … Purpose is that feeling that you are a part of something bigger than yourself, that you are needed, and that you have something better ahead to work for. Purpose is what creates true happiness.” -- building connection and community is one of the thing that Mark also mentioned in his speech on how we can progress. 

We all have great ideas, we all want to make the world a better place, we all have a purpose in life, but to achieve that we can't do that alone. When we work to give people a chance to get involved in the purpose and give them a role in it, people will start coming together and help us to achieve things we couldn't do on our own. 

That's why I love connecting people, I love seeing people working together especially for a greater good. I've been struggling myself in finding people who understand my purpose and my cause, I know the struggle when it feels like you are walking alone, the hard time when you try to explain things to people and they simply don't get it, or when you need a support and no one is supporting you. I know how it feels like to have a dream or ideas that you don't even know how to start or find the right people to share and work on it together -- I understand the struggle and that's why now, I love helping people to find other people to work together with. Of course not every connection works, sometimes it doesn't but when it does, it's really wonderful. 

No one can work on everything alone. We all need other people and sometimes we even need other community to help us. As I said we are here as a part of a greater purpose whatever it is and by helping each other we will give each other a chance to be part of that greater purpose. 

And to end this post, I will end it with a beautiful Jewish prayer quoted from Mark's speech, Mi Shebeirach; May the Source of strength who blessed the ones before us. Help us find the courage to make our lives a blessing. and let us say: Amen. - Yes, may we always find the courage to always make our lives a blessing for other people in any way that we can. 

The Twins : Empathy and Sympathy

I read an interesting post by a friend on facebook the other day. She was talking about grief and how people easily said: God won’t give you more than you can handle. 

“Am I wrong when I feel that I can’t handle the loss? When the pain is too much and my heart is hurting?”

Sometimes we also say, “Everything happens for a reason” in such situation. 

“Then what’s the reason of this? To hurt me? I can’t understand, is it my fault that I can’t understand the reason?”

Those two statements are often said with good intention but it hurts those who are mourn for the loss of their loved ones. 

When you are having a bad time, those are the last words you would want to hear. Trust me. 

This is where the thin line between empathy and sympathy lies.

Empathy means the feeling that you understand and share another person's experiences and emotions: the ability to share someone else's feelings (merriam-webster dictionary)

Sympathy means the feeling that you care about and are sorry about someone else's trouble, grief, misfortune, etc.: a sympathetic feeling (merriam-webster dictionary)

Both empathy and sympathy will make us want to support and comfort those who are in trouble, grief or misfortune. But both have a different way,

Sympathy:

“You will find the silver-line” 

“Everything happens for a reason”

“God will never give you something you can’t handle”

“At least you are still okay, at least your kids are okay”

“Just look at the bright side”

Sympathy will tend to try to make things better. But like seriously, saying those words won’t make anything better. It will only make people slap you in the face. 

Empathy:

“I understand your pain and it’s not easy. I will be here for you.”

“I can’t imagine how you feel, it must be hard for you.”

“I don’t’ know what to say but I’m glad you told me.”

Empathy is trying to understand other people’s feeling andwhat they are going through. It’s trying to see things from their perspective and connecting with them without trying so hard to make things better. 

When people is hurting, rarely words can make things better. Sometimes a listening ear and a hug are all people need to make them feel better. To know that we are not alone in going through the hard time is sometimes the best comfort.

Hope

(picture was taken from the internet)

Hope is an optimistic attitude of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes related to events and circumstances in one's life or the world at large. (Source: Wikipedia)

Hope:

1. To cherish a desire with anticipation: to want something to happen or be true

2. Trust

3. To desire with expectation of obtainment or fulfillment

4. To expect with confidence

(Source: Merriam-Webster dictionary)

Few years ago I volunteered in an organisation that worked with street children and people who lived in slum areas in Jakarta. I still remember that one night, we were distributing papers and colouring pencils to the children so they could draw anything they want, as all children do, they were so excited, each picking their own paper and chose the colours they want, sit down and drew. 

I was sitting with a boy on the side of the street as he was drawing. Curiously asked him, “What is your dream? What do you want to be when you grow up?” – There was a pause for a moment before he answered, “I don’t have a dream. I don’t think it is possible for me to have a dream.” and he continued to draw. His answer left me speechless. He was around 7 or 8 years old. Living in the street with no parents. He didn’t even know when his birthday was, his parents left him alone in Jakarta until someone took him in and worked him as street musician, begging for money from people. 

I still could not forget the look in his eyes when he said those words, there was no hope in it. I guess, maybe even no one ever asked him such question. It must be very sad to have lived without a dream that makes you hope will come true, especially for children. 

What would life feel like if you have no idea what to hope for? 

Hope is something that moves us from within, a confident believe that what we wish for or dream for will come true. Hope is the strength that will help us to endure and even overcome hardships in life. Hope is the spark in the eyes driven by passion. It's the reason that we live life. To lose hope I think would be like losing life itself. 

Hope is very close with expectations and as we all know, expectations are frail things. Expectations are easy to break if we are not careful. Thus, it is very important to put our hope in the right place so we can manage our expectations in the right way.

So, if I may ask you today, where do you put your hope? do you still have it? or have you lost it?