Heart Talk.

I’ve been fasting for the past week and on the fifth day I can say that Heaven is so kind for teaching me a lot of stuffs and revealing some facts.
 
On the fifth day, I figured out another fact about the person I’m currently praying for. It was quite devastating. I didn’t have enough sleep the night before. I had a heavy talk with a friend about this particular person, my mind hadn’t stop thinking and I was having a whole day meeting. So, yes, my heart was in a mess. I took some time to sit on the office pantry, stirring myself a cup of tea and sat on the side of the window, looking out. My heart was breaking but I was even too tired to shed a tear.
 
But then, I thought to myself, why would on earth I grief over something that is not even worth to shed a tear over? Didn’t I pray? Didn’t I fast? Didn’t I trust God? – and I started to laugh. Maybe people thought I was crazy for laughing with no reason but I know the exact reason why I was laughing. I asked God and He answered.
 
More things are revealed after and all the things that I was secretly wishing for was granted. What can I ask for more from God? I’m thankful. Things might not go in the way I wish they would be but, it is enough for me to know that God really listen to my prayers. I have to say that getting through this phase is like knowing God all over again and the way He’s romancing me to comfort my heart is definitely grand. I love Him.
 
As for the particular person I’m praying for, I know that Heaven loves him more than I do and I know that God knows what’s best for both of us. If we don’t end up together then it would be for our best, God sees the bigger picture that neither me nor him see at the present moment. Currently I don’t have any idea of what will become of us, all I can do is to pray and surrender. I pray for him, I pray for his future, his family, his potential and his faith in God. I pray that God will protect him and take care of him, because no matter how much I love and care about him, Heaven loves and cares about him more.
 
If things don’t go the way I want it to be, I ask God to grant me a big heart, peace to embrace His plan and the heart to still pray for his life. And yes, I would need to focus on other things rather than let myself carried by what I feel. I’m looking forward for His plan for me, hopefully I won’t get sidetracked again :)