Life can trap us inside a circle called routines and when we feel we are too busy, too occupied with the tasks at hand. We somehow, stop to love. We no longer have time to think of other people. We focus on ourselves, on our work, on our achievements. We tend to forget to spend some time to care for those around us. Let it be our family and our friends, let alone the strangers we've just met or people we only see once in a while.
There's a reason why I put the pictures above, it's because I would like to share the stories behind the pictures.
The first picture is a picture of me and an old woman I met around 5 years ago. She lived in a slum area in an old and abandoned chinese graveyard. She didn't talk much when we first met. She just smiled, A LOT and I didn't know why when I met her, I just fell in love with her smile. I came to visit her home. A small space with one bed, a little drawer for her clothes, a broken fan and nothing else. We sat on her bed. I asked her about her life, she explained briefly that she's married with a man much younger than her and he often beat her up when he's upset about something. "No one would come and help me, so I would just be silent and keep everything to myself. He's an evil, evil man. He often asked me for money." -- When I asked her about her children, she told me that her children lived far away from her. They didn't come visit her often. When they came, they would give her some money and her husband then would ask her for the money.
I didn't know what to say after hearing such story coming from an old woman who's holding my hand while she's telling me her story. She already had trouble with her hearing, so most of the time, when I asked or said something to her, she couldn't really hear me that well but she would smile everytime.
After that, whenever I returned to that place, I always came looking for her and spent the time sitting next to her, holding her hand or visiting her house, sitting on her bed and listening to her stories. Although she lived in such poor condition, she never asked me for money. She never asked me for anything. She's just happy to see me.
She always smiled whenever she saw me coming. The brightest smile I've ever seen and it warmed my heart. It always feels good to know that someone is happy to see you.
The hardest part was always the goodbye, the sad look on her eyes whenever I hugged her before coming home and promised that I would come back to see her again. The last promise I made...I never really fulfilled it and it would be something that I will regret. I will tell you why later on.
The second picture is a picture of me and some of the street children I met around Citos (a mall in Jakarta). They would beg for money of the red light and my first encounter with them was with some friends from YWAM (Youth With A Mission) Perth. We were there simply just to meet the children and played with them. Something that's done once in a while then becoming a routine. We were playing, singing, laughing, exchanging stories, taking pictures and being fun. Although they were there to beg for money, they never asked us for some money. Our company, our love and our presence were enough for them. We let them sit on our lap, we listened to their stories, we hugged them, we kissed them and we played with them.
The first time I went to meet them, honestly, I was afraid. I was afraid that they might do something that will harm me. I never be among the street children, I was always in my comfort zone. I was afraid that they would turn out to be rude and violent as maybe, many other people would think they would be. But, despite of my fear, I went to meet them because I wanted to know their life, I wanted to meet them and if anything bad might happen, I know God will protect me and...
I WAS WRONG.
They turned out to be the most loving children. They only long to be loved. They would hug you, cling on your arms and telling you their stories. Their love is changing my heart and in a way, changing my life. I thought I was going there to share my love but instead, I received much love from them. It's amazing when you just open your heart to love people. You might be suprised of the amount of love returned to you.
Yet, what keep people from loving and being kind, is the fact that we often get too busy with ourselves and with our things. We worry too much about our own matters and we become self-centered. We stop being kind when we don't feel like it.
That was my regret, as I got busy with work, new activities, new friends, problems at work, home and church and a fresh broken heart...I eventually worn out and feel tired. I stopped coming to visit the old woman, I stopped coming to visit the children. I stopped doing anything. I swallowed myself in bitterness and sadness. My heart grew colder and all I want to do now is to care about me and my needs. I put myself out to do a lot of things just to make me happy, to make me feel better. The focus was in me.
Until...i heard the news.
It was in the mid of 2012. I was chatting with a friend whom I used to go to the slums with. I saw some pictures of her on facebook when she visited the slum at the graveyard and decided to have a chat with her. I told her how much I miss that place and asked her about the old woman whom I always called as "Nenek" (grandma in Indonesian). I wasn't ready to receive her answer...
"Nenek has passed away last year...her house is no longer there. I don't know where her children buried her, but some people said that she was buried not far from the slum area."
There I was, in front of my computer...unable to say anything. Overwhelmed by all kinds of emotions running through my heart, I decided to end the chat and logged out. I was unable to define what I felt after receiving the news before it hit me hard and I began to weep.
I promised her that I would come back and visit her again. A promise that I couldn't keep until the end of her life.
I still remember her, smiling brightly once she saw me coming. She would always smile and smile everytime I asked her about her day. She would put her head on my shoulder, hugging my arm and sit with me while we watched the children at the slum playing with my other friends. She would pinched my arms and told me how chubby I am then she would show me her tiny little hands and her wrinkly skin.
The last time we met, she cried when I said goodbye. She held my hand tight. She had gone through hard times since the government decided to evict the people out of the slum area because a new building was about to be built in that area. Many houses from the slum area were demolished. Some people still insisted to stay but...sooner or later, the area needed to be cleared. Her house was soon to be demolished as well.
The last time we met, our trusted friend in the slum, a husband and wife promised us that they would take care of her. The last time we met, she went out to walk me home the farthest she could. Then, when I waved my goodbye, I could still see her smile although tears were running down her cheek.
It was really, the last time we met. Before I was busy with everything in my life and forgot about her. Forgot about the promised I made. My regret.
In the modern life, where people are technologically wired and connected to each other, LOVE is lost. What's I'm talking about is not about the love between lovers, but it's love towards one another. Love that we give to other people simple because we care about them, let them be our family, friends or even strangers at the streets or people that we see once in a while. We're too busy to stop and love. We're too occupied to stop and care. And that's so sad.
Although it seems like I have given up on them, it's the street children who are not giving up on me. They texted me, asking how am I doing, telling me that they've been missing me and wanting to see me. I thought of it as annoying at first, I was busy with MY LIFE and MY WORK and now you want me to divide my attention to you?! - I thought of them as demanding and it was just too much for me. My heart was growing so cold that it's no longer able to contain anything. I was upset with many things that I was unable to share my life with anyone. I was unlovable. But no matter, how short my replies and sometimes I didn't even reply to the text, the children kept texting me..they didn't give up. They believe in me, they believe in my heart that (used) to love them. They know the love is there somewhere inside me.
And it broke me down to my knees...
I cried to God at the fact that I have forgotten how to love. I have been so self-centered. I have been trying hard to be loved instead of to love. I have let so many things break my inner being, break my heart and break my passion...and I have let bitterness creeping into my heart. Taking over it and making it colder.
The street children never forget to love me. Their love for me is the reminder that I too need to remember to love. That sharing the love doesn't mean that we're losing it or we're going to be lacking of it but sharing the love means to double it. That investing your time, your attention and your love to other people is never a waste, it will always come back to you in multiple ways through many people.
One day, during my holiday with the family when we're queueing for a seat in a restaurant. I went to the toilet. People were also queueing for the toilet, so I stood in line, waiting for my turn. Not for long, an old woman came in a wheelchair, her granddaughter was pushing the wheelchair for her. They were having difficulties to get into the toilet, no one else seemed to care, so I decided to help them. Once I'm done helping them, the old woman smiled to me and said, "Thank you dear, God bless you...God bless you dear..." - and my heart felt so warm.
That's the joy of giving out the love and care to other people even if it's just a small thing done to a stranger: looking at how their face beamed with a SMILE...it will make you smile as well despite of how rough is your day.
Before it's too late, remember to love. No matter how busy you are, no matter how rough is your day, never forget to love. Some people wish to change the world and think that it takes a LOT to do that or simply they think that they need to DO BIG THINGS to change the world. Well, you don't have to have a lot first to give and you don't have to do big things first to change the world. You can change the world by changing one life at a time. HOW? by sharing the love to one person, by opening your eyes to the need of one person and help them. That's the best way to change the world.
I believe that the love that I once gave to Nenek has changed her life, has given her hope and made her feel loved. I believe that the love that I shared with the street children has changed their lives, has given them the joy and the hope that they are worthy to be loved. And what did I get in return? Their love changed my life. Nenek's love for me has changed my life, The street children's love for me has changed my life.
See, that whatever you give to other people it will come back to you eventually. You will never lack of love, that make you unable to give it to other people. You only need to be willing. To love means to let yourself open and vulnerable for people to hurt you, and believe me, sooner or later, people will hurt you eventhough you have tried to love them...but don't give up and you'll see that your love will change people.
The first picture is a picture of me and an old woman I met around 5 years ago. She lived in a slum area in an old and abandoned chinese graveyard. She didn't talk much when we first met. She just smiled, A LOT and I didn't know why when I met her, I just fell in love with her smile. I came to visit her home. A small space with one bed, a little drawer for her clothes, a broken fan and nothing else. We sat on her bed. I asked her about her life, she explained briefly that she's married with a man much younger than her and he often beat her up when he's upset about something. "No one would come and help me, so I would just be silent and keep everything to myself. He's an evil, evil man. He often asked me for money." -- When I asked her about her children, she told me that her children lived far away from her. They didn't come visit her often. When they came, they would give her some money and her husband then would ask her for the money.
I didn't know what to say after hearing such story coming from an old woman who's holding my hand while she's telling me her story. She already had trouble with her hearing, so most of the time, when I asked or said something to her, she couldn't really hear me that well but she would smile everytime.
After that, whenever I returned to that place, I always came looking for her and spent the time sitting next to her, holding her hand or visiting her house, sitting on her bed and listening to her stories. Although she lived in such poor condition, she never asked me for money. She never asked me for anything. She's just happy to see me.
She always smiled whenever she saw me coming. The brightest smile I've ever seen and it warmed my heart. It always feels good to know that someone is happy to see you.
The hardest part was always the goodbye, the sad look on her eyes whenever I hugged her before coming home and promised that I would come back to see her again. The last promise I made...I never really fulfilled it and it would be something that I will regret. I will tell you why later on.
The second picture is a picture of me and some of the street children I met around Citos (a mall in Jakarta). They would beg for money of the red light and my first encounter with them was with some friends from YWAM (Youth With A Mission) Perth. We were there simply just to meet the children and played with them. Something that's done once in a while then becoming a routine. We were playing, singing, laughing, exchanging stories, taking pictures and being fun. Although they were there to beg for money, they never asked us for some money. Our company, our love and our presence were enough for them. We let them sit on our lap, we listened to their stories, we hugged them, we kissed them and we played with them.
The first time I went to meet them, honestly, I was afraid. I was afraid that they might do something that will harm me. I never be among the street children, I was always in my comfort zone. I was afraid that they would turn out to be rude and violent as maybe, many other people would think they would be. But, despite of my fear, I went to meet them because I wanted to know their life, I wanted to meet them and if anything bad might happen, I know God will protect me and...
I WAS WRONG.
They turned out to be the most loving children. They only long to be loved. They would hug you, cling on your arms and telling you their stories. Their love is changing my heart and in a way, changing my life. I thought I was going there to share my love but instead, I received much love from them. It's amazing when you just open your heart to love people. You might be suprised of the amount of love returned to you.
Yet, what keep people from loving and being kind, is the fact that we often get too busy with ourselves and with our things. We worry too much about our own matters and we become self-centered. We stop being kind when we don't feel like it.
That was my regret, as I got busy with work, new activities, new friends, problems at work, home and church and a fresh broken heart...I eventually worn out and feel tired. I stopped coming to visit the old woman, I stopped coming to visit the children. I stopped doing anything. I swallowed myself in bitterness and sadness. My heart grew colder and all I want to do now is to care about me and my needs. I put myself out to do a lot of things just to make me happy, to make me feel better. The focus was in me.
Until...i heard the news.
It was in the mid of 2012. I was chatting with a friend whom I used to go to the slums with. I saw some pictures of her on facebook when she visited the slum at the graveyard and decided to have a chat with her. I told her how much I miss that place and asked her about the old woman whom I always called as "Nenek" (grandma in Indonesian). I wasn't ready to receive her answer...
"Nenek has passed away last year...her house is no longer there. I don't know where her children buried her, but some people said that she was buried not far from the slum area."
There I was, in front of my computer...unable to say anything. Overwhelmed by all kinds of emotions running through my heart, I decided to end the chat and logged out. I was unable to define what I felt after receiving the news before it hit me hard and I began to weep.
I promised her that I would come back and visit her again. A promise that I couldn't keep until the end of her life.
I still remember her, smiling brightly once she saw me coming. She would always smile and smile everytime I asked her about her day. She would put her head on my shoulder, hugging my arm and sit with me while we watched the children at the slum playing with my other friends. She would pinched my arms and told me how chubby I am then she would show me her tiny little hands and her wrinkly skin.
The last time we met, she cried when I said goodbye. She held my hand tight. She had gone through hard times since the government decided to evict the people out of the slum area because a new building was about to be built in that area. Many houses from the slum area were demolished. Some people still insisted to stay but...sooner or later, the area needed to be cleared. Her house was soon to be demolished as well.
The last time we met, our trusted friend in the slum, a husband and wife promised us that they would take care of her. The last time we met, she went out to walk me home the farthest she could. Then, when I waved my goodbye, I could still see her smile although tears were running down her cheek.
It was really, the last time we met. Before I was busy with everything in my life and forgot about her. Forgot about the promised I made. My regret.
In the modern life, where people are technologically wired and connected to each other, LOVE is lost. What's I'm talking about is not about the love between lovers, but it's love towards one another. Love that we give to other people simple because we care about them, let them be our family, friends or even strangers at the streets or people that we see once in a while. We're too busy to stop and love. We're too occupied to stop and care. And that's so sad.
Although it seems like I have given up on them, it's the street children who are not giving up on me. They texted me, asking how am I doing, telling me that they've been missing me and wanting to see me. I thought of it as annoying at first, I was busy with MY LIFE and MY WORK and now you want me to divide my attention to you?! - I thought of them as demanding and it was just too much for me. My heart was growing so cold that it's no longer able to contain anything. I was upset with many things that I was unable to share my life with anyone. I was unlovable. But no matter, how short my replies and sometimes I didn't even reply to the text, the children kept texting me..they didn't give up. They believe in me, they believe in my heart that (used) to love them. They know the love is there somewhere inside me.
And it broke me down to my knees...
I cried to God at the fact that I have forgotten how to love. I have been so self-centered. I have been trying hard to be loved instead of to love. I have let so many things break my inner being, break my heart and break my passion...and I have let bitterness creeping into my heart. Taking over it and making it colder.
The street children never forget to love me. Their love for me is the reminder that I too need to remember to love. That sharing the love doesn't mean that we're losing it or we're going to be lacking of it but sharing the love means to double it. That investing your time, your attention and your love to other people is never a waste, it will always come back to you in multiple ways through many people.
One day, during my holiday with the family when we're queueing for a seat in a restaurant. I went to the toilet. People were also queueing for the toilet, so I stood in line, waiting for my turn. Not for long, an old woman came in a wheelchair, her granddaughter was pushing the wheelchair for her. They were having difficulties to get into the toilet, no one else seemed to care, so I decided to help them. Once I'm done helping them, the old woman smiled to me and said, "Thank you dear, God bless you...God bless you dear..." - and my heart felt so warm.
That's the joy of giving out the love and care to other people even if it's just a small thing done to a stranger: looking at how their face beamed with a SMILE...it will make you smile as well despite of how rough is your day.
Before it's too late, remember to love. No matter how busy you are, no matter how rough is your day, never forget to love. Some people wish to change the world and think that it takes a LOT to do that or simply they think that they need to DO BIG THINGS to change the world. Well, you don't have to have a lot first to give and you don't have to do big things first to change the world. You can change the world by changing one life at a time. HOW? by sharing the love to one person, by opening your eyes to the need of one person and help them. That's the best way to change the world.
I believe that the love that I once gave to Nenek has changed her life, has given her hope and made her feel loved. I believe that the love that I shared with the street children has changed their lives, has given them the joy and the hope that they are worthy to be loved. And what did I get in return? Their love changed my life. Nenek's love for me has changed my life, The street children's love for me has changed my life.
See, that whatever you give to other people it will come back to you eventually. You will never lack of love, that make you unable to give it to other people. You only need to be willing. To love means to let yourself open and vulnerable for people to hurt you, and believe me, sooner or later, people will hurt you eventhough you have tried to love them...but don't give up and you'll see that your love will change people.
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